A Tale of Two Cats or one bad choice

It all started off all innocent like. Two kittens. Cute images cloud the brain like pink fluffy clouds. Cat energy, feline cunning and affection, yin and yang of co-dependance.

I should have known better. Even as the irresistible charm of the kitty cuteness on our second visit to the little furry bastards made my eyes glaze over; those two piercing cat eyes that stared deeply into mine. This is where the kitten soundtrack record should have come to a stratching, screeching halt and I should have noticed that they looked right through me, not at me. Not at all. Not one hint of what was to come in THAT which I mistook for instant like, dare I say affection? How stupid of me.

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Eyes too dangerous to look into

My wife fared far better in her choice, she picked a clear winner. Me? I picked the loser, the yang to her yin.

But that was not readily apparent to one so beguiled as was I. The fucking cat wasn’t even the right fur or color. Why is it that every time I have the option of choosing a cat, (and I don’t pick often but once upon a time I catered to a solid grey cat)  my want is always the farthest from my initial wish … why oh why? Am I such a sucker?

And I should further have clued into what was to be when my dear wife upon deeper observations, suddenly compromised and suggested we change the choice of name for that one to Luna, instead of Lilly. Ok, that made instant sense as I’d already espied the lunacy that one embodied. Sure Luna, short for Lunatic.

I’m not certain if there is such a thing as cat racism but I don’t want to be painted with that brush. I was game to give my yang pick every opportunity to prove that I like all cats. Now I readily admit that I do not like all cats. Hell no.

The Cat Came Back comes to mind, as do all the evils (solutions to the problem) the song suggests, railing desperately about the toxic suffering extremes that a feline as evil as this plucks from the stuffings of life.

Sadly the ideal kitten scenario has been laid waste. Shredded tatters are all that remain of the innocent images we once imagined, the wickedly sharp clawed evil, a nastiness so vile has utterly destroyed a simple wish.

How was I to know it would be a piss pest?

Daily events  include moping up ever expanding puddles of pee in select areas of the home, closed doors equal containment our only defense against further defilement; the occasional cat turds.  Go figure, take that cute (evil can look very pretty, no?) feline and place it lovingly upon a clean, freshly prepared litter box only to have said now possessed beast look piercingly up, at and right through you, hop nimbly out of the offending box, take three steps to the side and piss a wee lake at your feet. WTF?!! Time and time again. And early mornings just outside the master bedroom follow suit, ripping me from light slumber if I hear it, the tell tale tinkle … and if I’ve not heard that I won’t fail to hear the scritching scratching of sharp nails attempting to hide the crime under a layer of what … air? Stupid cat.

And in a land where wasting paper is a sin, our paper towel and bleach consumption is bordering on a crime. Something has to go. Oops … did I write go? I meant change 😉

When I look at cat yin and then at cat yang, I resent the yang and long for the yin. Rufus is feline purrfection, while Luna(tic) is simply fucked.


Yin to my Yang

Lucky for Luna the days of burlap sacks, bricks and creeks are long a thing of the past. But what to do?

The classical definition of insanity is expecting a different outcome while repeating the same actions over and over. I know that I’m not the insane one. That prize goes to Luna, while I suffer the consequences.

Her behavior has banished her to the life of an outdoorsy cat. That’s got to suck cause she looks indoorsy.

Playing the Tourist Card

Heidelberg a very old and romantic city, also very easy on the eyes; the old part that is. That was one of the reasons running through my head when I formed the idea to visit there with my daughter who was visiting Europe/Germany for the very first time.It’s a city in Germany. You may have heard of it. It’s kind of popular with the tourist crowd. It’s also renowned amongst the academically minded for it’s institutions of higher learning. Heidelberg is Germanys  oldest university town.


rail lines

Driving there from here was not an option as although there is a rapid route of travel known as the Autobahn here in Germany, it is also plagued with congestion issues that do not make for rapid travel as one would reasonably expect. Instead we opted for the logical alternative, the train. Even that option offers various modes from the normal commuter train to the high speed ICE experience. In this Bundesland/state/province of Baden Württemberg rail tourism is encouraged with discounted tickets offered at attractive prices (on the normal trains). For those with deeper pockets and less time the highspeed rail transit costs considerably more. We did the math and picked the rediculously low cost return ticket for two persons at 26 Euros as compared to the nearly 200 Euros for the high speed option.

2013©myron unrau

train waiting

The drawback to cheap travel are certain restrictions such as not being able to ride until 09:00 (a civilized time to begin anything), however when one considers the nearly four hour travel time to get to Heidelberg and adding in the equally long return trip and realizing the remaining available time between arrival and departure if one doesn’t want to get home too late, things begin to feel compressed.

Add to that that I forgot to take a look at Google Earth to see how the city was laid out. Erroneously I had assumed that Heidelberg might be similar to Freiburg (im Breisgau) ala step off the train, walk out of the train station and straight into the interesting bit of the city. I was wrong in that assumption, ill prepared and as blind as a wide eyed tourist set adrift in a strange new place.

In short time we realized the error of our pedestrian ways and jumped onto the next available bus in hopes of getting to the good parts of town quicker. With success. And only a vague feeling of confusion. But we had to make a choice, would we try to get to see the Schloss (romantic castle) or check out the ‘Alt Stadt’ (old city). Time was like mercury, running out if we were to keep our return schedule. Not a fun situation to be in when there is lots of cool things to see and I tried as best as I could to banish the thought that this little sightseeing jaunt was going to turn out to be a long train ride with a stop-over in Heidelberg.


Heidelberg castle above the academy sciences

As fortune would have it the rail line up the the castle was broken (technical issues we were told). That decided things for us and we relaxed and took it easy as we strolled the narrow streets of the old town on our way to the picturesque bridge spanning the Neckar river. From there we got a lovely touristy view of the castle up on the hill and mingled with the new invading hordes/tourists from nearly every corner of the globe.


tourist in orange

Honestly, I don’t much care for being a ‘tourist’ but no matter how I look at it, even though I live in Germany, I am a tourist when it comes to seeing new places. It can’t be helped I’m afraid.

We spent our time enjoying ourselves and after viewing the typical sights without wasting the little time we had, we stopped into an quaint old Brauhaus for something to eat and some local beer. As the tables along the front outside in the laneway were all occupied we sat inside with a view to the outside. The unexpected surprise of this lunch stop was a beer with the insane alcohol content of 33% touted as the strongest beer in the world.  A rather sweetish treat on a warm day.


Vetter 33 beer

The rest of our remaining time was spent walking back to were we left the first bus that dropped us off at Universitaets Platz (not my own video; voice is not myself).


retro tour guide Heidelberg style

Just  thinking about our return rail trip makes me tired and suffice it to say that you should take more than three hours to visit this charming city to really absorb some of the atmosphere and sense of it all. We rather enjoyed it and would gladly come back.

But we would want to do it without the three train there and three train back bit. To say that we were tired when we got home that night would be an understatement.


tired feet

travel on the wet coast of canada

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Art & Coastal Culture


Detail from Bill Reid carving Raven and the First Men, Museum of Anthropology, Vancouver, BC


Totem Detail, Museum of Anthropology, Vancouver, BC


Frog Totem Detail, Museum of Anthropology, Vancouver, BC

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Spoons Are For the Mouth

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Spoon on Spoons

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Neatly Arranged

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Arranged Another Way

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Spoons at Angles

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Spoon Shapes